Virtual Moxie - The Cure For The Common Virtual Assistance Practice

What Goes Around Comes Around

Starting the New Year off strongly, a Pick Anastacia’s Brain question from Brandy, who wrote:

LOVED your Moxie Tip this morning (#93—Who Defines You). I’m wondering about something, and I know you’ll set me straight. I’ve listened to you, and don’t want to let clients call the shots for my business, but every single prospect I talk with really tries hard to do that. Frankly, it pisses me off.

After reading Moxie today, my husband pointed out to me that when I moved my domains away from Go Daddy last week to apply pressure on them to back off their support of SOPA, I was doing exactly what the PCs were trying to do to me. Basically, he was saying I’m no better than they are. That pissed me off, too, but I’ve been thinking about it, and would love to hear your thoughts. I can’t seem to find clients who don’t want to push me around. Could this be a case (for me) of do as I say, not as I do?

Ding, ding, ding… we have a winner! Give that girl the big purple unicorn!! And give your husband a huge smooch on the cheek from me for calling you on what he saw. :)

I’m glad, truly, that you’ve been listening, Brandy. I’ve taught so many times over the past 15 years that VAs, as business owners, have the right and the responsibility to make decisions about how they run their businesses. This is an across-the-board reality; they get to decide their fees, how they expect clients to pay them, when they work, what happens when they need to be away from the “office,” and quite literally everything else about how things go.

All of that, in combination with who they are, as much, if not more so than what they do, is what attracts ideal clients to them.

Clients not attracted by something about how VAs’ businesses are run can choose to leave the relationships, or not get in to begin with, but they do not have the right to try to pressure or coerce their VAs into changing business standards to suit them.

You get that—yet it’s who you attract.

And the reason? At least in part, it’s because you think it’s ok to do that to other businesses, as proven by moving your domains to pressure GoDaddy. And frankly, you’ve confused the Universe. You can't "do as I say, not as I do." That only works on kids--and usually not especially well because even little kids know, deep inside, that the double standard just isn't "right." :)

I watched, this past week, as customers put pressure on Verizon Wireless to reverse a decision they’d made for their company with regard to a fee they wanted to charge. In the same week, 70,000 domains,, yours among them, were moved away from Go Daddy in an attempt to get them to change their stance on the SOPA legislation. Earlier last year, customers pressured The Gap into ditching a new logo with threats of never shopping there again.

Like your prospects, every one of those customers had the right to take their business dealings elsewhere if they didn’t like whatever the company in question was doing, but none of them were entitled (and I use that word pointedly because that’s how they behave) to vocally and publicly apply pressure to the companies to get the companies to do as the consumers wanted them to.

So yes; when you join the mob to pressure other businesses to change to suit what you think they should do, while expecting that clients will not do that to you, there’s a disconnect you’re living with. You can’t behave one way while expecting the Universe to bring you the opposite.

Decide where you stand on businesses and their leaders making decisions.. And then behave accordingly across your life and work. We all know what they say about karma… right? :)

Why RFPs Suck

An RFP (Request for Proposal) is a corporate and governmental construct used to get vendors or suppliers to bid on work, vying against unseen others who are also vying for the work. At its core, it's set up to favor, or give the upper hand to, the person who has the work and it commodtizes the worker's time and skill. It's not fair in the corporate/governmental arenas, but it's accepted as "the way things are done."

Unfortunately, it's been brought over into our world (probably by folks who didn't know another way, or didn't really see what they were doing), and tries to apply itself to our new and very different paradigm--that of business owners working together as equals. As such, to utilize it (at least the way it's set up to work) is to subject ourselves to an outmoded construct, and to put ourselves in a place none of us want to be (that of "less than" the client).

For us, RFPs suck. We can't stand up and say that VAs are business owners then lay down for the old way of doing things.

You are a business owner, not anyone's employee, or less than anyone. If you want to stand in that space and be seen as an equal in the relationship you cannot "bid" for work or commoditize what you do. It's demeaning to you, and shifts the power in the relationship to one side.

If you belong to an organization with an RFP system, consider asking them to change it. Or, if answering RFPs, refuse to play the game. Stand up strong in how you reply. Let the clients know you're not bidding, competing, or a commodity. Show yourself to be the choice, or someone to be passed by.  Make RFPs a thing of history--just as you have made bosses, being told what to do, not being able to say no, and oh-so many other things our profession is known for.

Higher Standards Without Perfectionism or Burnout

In October, I was delighted to participate in my friend Molly Gordon's Self-Employment Telesummit. Because I wasn't available during the live sessions (I was traveling), Molly and I did an interview that was then offered to telesummit participants.  

During that interview, Molly asked me to tell her more about my oft repeating of "Your standards can always be higher," and to say more about how one might raise standards without perfectionism or burnout. It was such a great question, and I wanted to write about it.

There's an amazing quotation by Eden Phillpotts: "The Universe is full of magical things patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper."

Standards aren't about perfectionism. They're about fit. Your standards need to fit you now. And as you're a growing being, as you grow, so should they. As you grow, your wits sharpen, life changes, and so should your standards in business and life.

For instance, I lead a particular retreat I love. It's called What's Next? It gives women the space/time to get out of their lives and work on whatever's "next" for them (which could be anything from the formation of a new company, the starting of a book, or even taking the very next three steps needed to grow a current practice). It's always a small retreat, and so it's very important that the women fit with one another.

My standard around choosing participants used to be to rely on the idea that the women attracted to the retreat would likely be similar in many ways, and probably a good fit, so I'd say something like, "Ten spaces available, and when they're gone, they're gone!"

And I got gobsmacked by the inclusion of one who was the polar opposite of a good fit. The lessons were big and painful. I came home with sharper wits, and upgraded the standard to, "Ten spaces available, when they're gone their gone, and you have to apply and tell me why you want to come."

I got gobsmacked again. And with still sharper wits, I upgraded the standard to, "If you'd like to come, please apply, and we'll talk." I had big conversations with the applicants. I explored why they wanted to come, what they wanted to work on, all sorts of things I'd not done before.

And the last What's Next retreat I led was beyond awesome. The group was perfectly matched. It was beautiful, powerful, fabulous... I can't say enough about how well it went or the magic that was created by them when they were together.

We outgrow clothes, shoes, relationships, jobs, houses....so it makes sense that we outgrow our standards. My saying that standards can always be higher is my way of reminding people to check in with their own, to see if they've been outgrown and need adjusting.

In my view, that shouldn't cause burnout. Maybe doing it once each year is enough. Or maybe, if you're like me, it's easier to be awake and aware and adjust things as you go, with one over-arching review each year.

The review, like the standards, has to fit you. Just be sure you make the time and take the time to review and upgrade in order to have greater ease in your business and life!

You Have to Pay to Play...Or Do You?

I've been sitting here for an hour trying to think how to write about this without sounding like I'm accusing or spanking anyone.Not sure I can, so I'll ask you to know my heart, and that that's not the point of this at all. It's more of a cautionary tale, really, for those who do teleclasses, telesummits and the like, as well as those who benefit from them.

Last week, someone I know shared that she'd found a tool that let her save audio replays from a telesummit. She shared that the telesummit organizer had made the replays available only for 24 hours, and if you wanted the audio for download, you needed to buy the package that included the downloadable mp3s.

She didn't want to pay, found this tool*, and saved the audios to listen to at her convenience.

I said, "You do know what that is, right?"

She paused... and I heard the lightbulb go off as she realized she'd stolen them. She was genuinely disarmed by that; it was clear she hadn't thought about it in that light. She said she'd delete them immediately. I trust her heart... I know that she did it when we finished our conversation.

So the cautionary tale is about not assuming that your streaming audio is safe. It's just not. If it's streaming, people can (and clearly do) use this to save a copy. Maybe there's a call in there to change the model. Maybe it's not free streaming at all anymore. Or maybe it's all free downloads, and an upsell to something else. I don't know, but it's clear that streaming replays aren't staying on the server where they're hosted, so....?

And the other cautionary bit is for those who may want audios streaming on a site, or an ebook from another where you have to sign up for a list to get it, or anything where there's an exchange of some sort required for you to get what you want. I ask you to think about not using tools to rip other people off. We all have the right to name our price for what it is that we do, and no one has to like it, nor do they have to pay it. But to take it in a way that's not in accordance with the price set forth is to steal it--pure and simple. You wouldn't want someone to do that to you, so although it's become far easier for us to not have to pay to play anymore, please do. It's the right thing. And we could all use some more of the right thing in this world.

Your turn....do you buck the system to get what you want? Why is that or isn't that ok for you to do? And if you organize audio events, are you shocked to know this is available and easy to do, or do you just accept this as one of the risks of doing business virtually?

 

*I didn't link to the tool because I didn't want to share it. 

A Change of Attitude Changes Everything

BWYFA -- An acronym meaning "Be where your feet are." -- Unknown

I live in Baltimore -- not too far from Amish country. In my 48 years on this planet, I've been there several times, and there has always been one thing about the Amish that has touched me most. It's that, in their lives, every act or action is equal. No matter what they do, they are fully present in the moment.

Whether they are baking a cake, or scrubbing the floor, or canning vegetables, or feeding the animals, no one thing is done with more attention or intent or is more sacred or special than any other.

Everything is a ritual. There is no rushing to get to important things, all things are important. And in making everything equally important, they bring excellence to each thing they do.

And I know that when I am faced with doing something difficult, or that I don't really want to do during my workday, I find it easier, somehow, when I bring excellence into it. Keeping that in mind allows me to approach everything I do from a place of quality... and suddenly, the normally tedious work isn't as tedious, urgency takes a back seat to doing it right, my attitude improves, and so does my day.

Sometimes, though, that doesn’t exactly work. Paying bills isn’t any more fun just because I’m doing them well, if you know what I mean.

But my fabulous bookkeeper and friend, Jessica Reagan Salzman, gave me another way to reframe it which always, by itself, or in combination with the lens of excellence, makes things right for me.

She suggested, and rightly so, that I think about why I’m grateful to get to do whatever it is that I’m doing. For instance, when paying my phone bill, I think how grateful I am that I live in a place and time where telephone service allows me to connect with people and do the work I do and love to do. In that frame of mind, paying the phone bill becomes something I happily and willingly do.

Contentment comes from giving up wishing I were somewhere else, doing something else, and focusing my attention right here right now. As mentioned above -- BWYFA.

So the next time you feel the crush of time, or there's something you do which you dislike or which is tedious, take a deep breath and relax into bringing excellence and gratitude to that activity. It could (probably will!) change everything for you!

Stop Trying to Find "THE Way" and Just Get Busy

A couple of years ago, I would absolutely have been called an organization addict. I was enthralled by the idea that there were amazing tools “out there” that could transform my physical space as well as the space inside my head into perfectly honed paradises.

I bought gobs of things—always sure they were going to be helpful. Back at the office, though, 99% of the time, they simply weren’t. So they sat. In my office. Taking up space while I pondered what to do with them since they weren’t going to be the magic I imagined they’d be. Their very presence became an issue for me over time, as you might imagine.

My friend, Amy Thill, a fabulous Virtual Assistant and space/time management goddess laid down the law. She said, smartly:

"Buy nothing else. If you can't stop yourself, though, get them home and they don’t work as you thought they would, either take them immediately back to the store, or if that’s not possible, immediately donate them to charity. Do whatever it takes to get them out of your space just as quickly as you can."

I don’t think I’ve ever felt so liberated, and I quickly donated more supplies to Good Will than I think they’ve ever gotten from another donor.

The biggest lesson I learned from all of that? If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

Yeah… in truth, I didn’t really have any space issues. My ways of dealing with my stuff suited me and the way my brain works. But the cooler the organizing tools I found, the more I was convinced that there had to be a better way for me.

Not. So. Much.

On a similar yet different note—I’m often asked for the best way to do something. For instance, the best way to collaborate with clients. Or the best way to manage a to-do list. You get the idea, I’m sure.

I seriously wish I had that answer, or a magic pill I could give people that would transform their woes to wins. But in the same way that there is no perfect way to deal with all space organizing needs, there are no perfect, one-size-fits-most solutions to anything for your Virtual Assistance practice. There’s only what’s perfect for YOU. And that takes experimenting and time. Time to try things. Time to figure out they don’t work. Time to figure out how to screw with them enough to make them work. Time to figure out exactly what makes perfect sense to you and your own brain.

Stop looking around you for the answer. It’s not out there. There is nothing greener on the other side. What’s there is just a different shade of green. And that particular green might help you in one way, but the loss of the old green might make things more difficult in another way.

Ask friends and colleagues what they do and all you’re going to find is what’s perfect for someone else. And it’s ok to run that through your own filters to see if anything there actually makes sense to you, but make sure you do that.

You’ll get further along by listening to your own self than you ever will in looking at what other people are doing or selling.

One thing that has worked well for my clients when they struggle is to look at what’s worked for them their whole lives long. So, how, for instance, did you organize yourself when you were in school? Chances are if you made it through that, whatever worked then can help you now. How do you organize yourself and your family at home? Chances are there are pieces of that that will help you with your business, as well. How do you prefer to keep in touch with old friends? Chances are that's how you'll prefer to keep in touch with clients.

You know how to do this. Stop looking and asking and get busy doing it. If you let the set up or organizing pieces stop you while you look for “it,” you’ll never get anywhere.

Get busy and who knows where you'll end up. :)  I look forward to seeing the journey!

What Preparing For Irene Can Teach You About Your Biz

As many of you know all too well, the east coast of the United States just lived through one of the biggest, baddest hurricanes to ever make landfall here, and it came on the heels of a not-insignificant earthquake. Did I ever think I’d really experience something like this one/two punch from Mother Nature here in Baltimore? Nope. This stuff really doesn’t happen here. So did I know what to do to keep myself as safe as possible? Nope. Didn’t have a clue.

I still don’t have a clue how to keep myself safe in the case of an earthquake. That’s in part because we didn’t have any warning or time to prepare, and part because almost as soon as it was over, we were faced with Irene. But you can bet your life that I’m going to learn what to do in case of an earthquake now that I know, first hand, that it can happen here.

As for Irene…Saturday night, when the storm peaked for us, it was pretty scary—and I’m a full 15 miles away from the Chesapeake Bay, so I can only imagine what it may have been like for people who were closer to the bigger dangers the storm presented. As I sat in my office Tweeting with others in the thick of the storm, the rain was pounding, the wind was gusting, the trees were bending, and the lights were flickering. And the only thing that made it easier for me was knowing that I had prepared for it.

I’m not a hysterical person. Not by a long shot. Yet, when we were heartily urged to do certain things—just in case--by experts with far greater experience in dealing with hurricanes than I have, I did them. I bought water and food enough to last five days--for us and the cats. I made sure I had flashlights (not candles—burning them during a dangerous storm, I learned, creates more danger) and plenty of batteries. I bought matches to lite our stove if I needed to. I had tarps and duct tape to cover broken windows. I had a great first-aid kit. I even had safety pins, which were on the preparedness list, and I still don’t have a clue what good they would have done me. I did my laundry in advance of the storm, and stowed away all the patio furniture, bird houses, and wind chimes. I located our non-electric land line back-up phone, made a paper list of emergency numbers, charged cell and laptop batteries, backed up computers, and emailed clients to let them know what was going on and what my plan was if we lost power and services for an extended period of time. I filled my car with gas. Oh, and I found a battery-operated radio. Just in case.

Some of my friends scoffed at what I did. But me? I felt better in doing it. And isn't that the reason we do anything we do? It's the reason we buy insurance. It's the reason we pack extra underwear when we travel. It's the reason we continue to market even when we have full practices. We feel better when we're in action, and when we feel prepared.

I believe it’s better to have and not need than to need and not have. And I don’t believe in screwing around with my life. I’m 48 now and know I’m not invincible.

My point for telling you all this (and there was a happy ending, btw… we were fine, here in the Brice household, when all was said and done, although more than a million people in Maryland didn't fare nearly as well) is that while it was smart for me to do what I did while others thought it was ok to not do it, it's the same in business. Some prepare for the possibility of their having problems, and some don't.

Some buy E&O insurance, and some don't. Some create strong standards, and some don't. Some know where they're going, and some don't. And some prepare for a business loss by creating a business disaster recovery plan, and some don’t. Those who do do so to feel more certain and safe. And those who don't don't—because they believe themselves to be invincible/don’t believe a loss can happen to them, or because it simply takes too much time and effort.

No one is invincible. Not personally, and not professionally. As for too much time and effort to take care of yourself and your business? It takes a boat load of each. I admit that. But I can only imagine the time and effort it would take to try to recover from a loss one wasn't even remotely prepared for.

While I was concerning myself with preparing for the hurricane, I took great comfort in knowing that, among other things, because I have a business recovery plan, I didn’t have to also worry about what would happen to my business as a result of whatever happened here because of Irene.

My wish for you is that you should know such comfort.

Be smart and plan for how you’ll take care of yourself and your biz in the event of something happening to you—regardless of the cause. Truly, it’s not as unlikely as you might think. And, as we learned when we were caught unaware by last week's earthquake, trouble can be on you before you even have time to blink--much less have time to figure out what you're going to do.

Your turn...are you as prepared in business and life to weather whatever trouble comes your way? Or do you not feel that's necessary?

Learning Lessons, Cheetah Style!

Over the weekend, I saw the Disney movie African Cats. If you haven’t seen it, do. It’s beautiful and amazing, and you’ll feel so very good by the time you leave the theatre.

In the middle of it, I did something I never do in a movie—I whipped out my Blackberry and took some notes to help me write this post to share with you. Horrible movie behavior, I know, and I'm glad I did it (fwiw, I wouldn't have done it, except there were only six of us in the theatre, and I knew I wouldn't bother a soul). 

What I noted came at a part in the movie where young cheetahs were learning the things they needed to know to survive on the savanna. The top five, in reverse order, are:

5. Stand your ground with hyenas
4. Even little dogs bite back
3. Don’t get fresh with an ostrich
2. Buffalo are grumpy
1. Never mess with lions

Learning
On the savanna, the cheetah learns experientially—often from the school of hard knocks. So the way a cheetah gets a lesson is to have a run-in with a little dog, for instance, getting bitten in the process. Or inquisitively checking out a buffalo and discovering its grumpiness. Or taunting an ostrich and finding out what happens.

But the cheetah does something that most of us forget to do. She pays attention, noticing what she’s learned and incorporating it into future behavior. The cheetah knows it’s the only way she can survive.

We humans, we have a lot of experiential learning, too. But most of us do something different from the cheetah. We don’t bother to really GET the lesson and incorporate it into future behavior. If we experience something unpleasant, we do what needs to be done to get away from the unpleasantness. As soon as we’re free of it, we sigh in relief and head off toward a celebration, experience forgotten, lessons unlearned.

Likewise, learning from positive experiences, we ride the wave of positivity, not bothering to notice what the experience had in it that we need to take away.

Oh, sure, we say, “I really learned my lesson THIS time,” but in truth, whatever we think we’ve learned is usually immediately forgotten. We learned, in fact, nothing.

Why we don’t get it
It could be argued that what’s done is done, and we choose to move on and be present for what’s next. But I don’t believe that’s true for the vast majority of folks. I don’t think most of us are very good at that at all. I think it’s that we’re running so fast on whatever gerbil wheels we’ve put ourselves on that we just move from one thing to the next as soon as we can and “Done with that, what’s next?” almost becomes a mantra.

Many may think all that rapid movement equals productivity—getting as much done as possible in whatever time we have. Pishtosh; that’s just backwards. No one can be productive if she keeps revisiting the same lessons because she didn’t get things the first time around (or the second, or the third!). Three steps forward, two steps back never gets a person very far, you know?

What to do differently
In order to survive and more importantly thrive in life and work, we need to take a lesson from our animal pals in Africa. We need to stay present and ask ourselves, “What, beyond the very obvious, should I be learning here and taking away with me so that the next time something like this happens, I can do it better or smarter or with greater ease?” THEN we need to stay right there, wait for the answer(s), and DO something with the answer(s) we get.

To do anything less is to be sleep walking through life. And as long as we’re sleep walking, we not only miss the lessons, but we miss a lot of the really yummy stuff, too. Interestingly, the cheetah doesn’t have the luxury of sleep walking through her life. To do so—to not get the lessons, and fast—would surely get her killed. We’re lucky that we don’t face that sort of harsh reality, and yet, I wonder if that very fact doesn’t leave us lazy. If we believe we can get it next time, why bother to get it now?

The reason
Why bother to get it now? Simple--nothing else makes any sense. Learn now, or be doomed to repeat. Repeating is really stupid, holds us back, keeps us stuck. If you haven’t read my post (Trust Your Knowing), now would be a good time to do that. Just sayin’.

Go slow to go fast
That’s this week’s Bit O’Moxie. Go slow today; learn what you have to learn, so you can go faster in those same places tomorrow. If you need help, get help so that the learning will be meaningful. Struggling here is stupid and useless. Get help, get the lesson, move forward.

Today (tomorrow, tomorrow’s tomorrow, etc.), don’t be so quick to run from one thing to the next. Stop when you finish something—whether positive, negative, or with no emotional charge for you at all. Be mindful. Stay present and notice the lesson, and the lesson behind the obvious lesson in each thing you do.

If you think it would be helpful, make a note about what happened and what you learned. If you need to update processes and procedures, take the time to do it right in the moment. Don’t trust your freshly-schooled brain to remember—we both know it probably won’t.

And the next time you’re in a similar circumstance, pull out the note to remind you of what you did the last time you were there, and let it help you in the present. Think of it as creating your own internal database of lessons according to you and your experiences.

Over time, you won’t need the notes at all, or you’ll need them far less often. You’ll get lessons the first time, and when you see a situation coming you already know a thing or two about, you’ll be able to just respond from a place of deep knowing. And that’s when life and work get really magical, because you’ll be able to live, like the cheetah, at your growth edge; at your place of highest potential.

I’m convinced that this is where (well, at least one place where) we have it all over the cheetah. She may learn lessons faster, and she may be the fastest thing on land. But she’s only fast for 30 seconds—after that, she’s completely exhausted. But us? We have more in us than that. Think what good we can do in our lives, work, and the world if we actually got our lessons and applied the learning as we moved forward.

What are you learning? How close to your growth edge do you live your precious life?

On Justin Bieber...

 

I admit to being a bit ashamed of myself.

Until Friday, I genuinely thought that Justin Bieber was a construct—a fiction created by Usher. A cute kid who could sing a bit, but without any substance.

I even said something fairly snarky on Facebook on Wednesday, as I mused aloud as to why in the world Never Say Never (Justin's biopic) was being screened in 3-D. What did Bieber have that was 3-D-esque? Was he going to whip his flow at the audience?

Then, on Friday morning, a friend told me I had to go see it. She’d taken her two daughters—both raving Bieber fans—and was surprised to find that there were all sorts of biz lessons he took away from it.

Being that she’s an influencer in my life, I found myself looking up movie times on Fandango. When I saw there was a showing in 22 minutes (just about the amount of time it would take me to get to the theatre, get popcorn, and get a seat), I knew the Universe was laughing at me and sending me a message.

So I went. And I didn’t even have a little girl to take with me. Luckily, it was an early-release day here and there were lots of little girls in my theatre, raptly paying attention, and making heart signs with their hands. One even cried. Sobbed, actually. :)

I was touched. I was too young for the Beatles and Elvis. And I’m too old to be over the moon with Bieber fever. But those little girls (both on screen, and in the theatre with me) gave me a glimpse of that sort of adoration. It was sweet—and beyond powerful.

And like my friend, I walked away with considerable (for me) lessons, not the least of which is, don’t assume. There’s always something more to see.

Some other lessons I learned:

1. Justin Bieber is talented. His music may not light me up, but that doesn’t diminish the fact that the kid is talented. He plays drums, guitar, and keyboards, well (and maybe other instruments I don’t know about). He can move his body. The reason he got in front of L.A. Reid, and Usher—he’s talented. They groomed him to be a phenomenon. He came with the talent.

Lesson learned: You have to come with the mad skills, or there’s nothing to work with.

2. He has a strong foundation overarchingly built on love. His mother loved him enough to have him, even though she was an unwed teen. Her parents loved her and him enough to be deeply involved and supportive. He has a strong faith in God. His team loves him…they obviously care most about him and his work (I’m sure they keep their eyes on the prize that comes with his work, too), and they never forget that he’s most important. All that love has given him an obviously unshakable sense of self.

Lesson learned: Strong foundations really matter

3. A couple times during the movie, his vocal coach gave him the choice to do something different and patiently waited for him to decide on a direction. Each time, he chose to stay the course; he wants this life. Geezie—the kid went from being completely unknown to selling out Madison Square Garden in 22 minutes, in four years. FOUR years.

Lesson learned: Have a dream and live it. Never let people tell you that you can’t do something you want to do. But remember that lesson #1 comes into play in this.

4. He has an incredible team. I don’t think what he does would be half as good if he didn’t have the team.

Lesson learned: Having a great team is critical to success, and to happiness in work.

5. In each city, his team members goes into the town an meets kids and their parents, listens to their stories about Justin, and give away truly great tickets (like 2nd row, on the floor) to his show. The guy who discovered him said (about that), “The guy from Extreme Home Makeover and I have the BEST jobs in the world.”

Lesson learned: The marketing message? Give stuff away. Give it with love. Give it freely. Find unexpected ways to delight people.

7. There’s a part in the movie where they’re describing Justin watching Michael Jackson talking about how he never really had a childhood, and Justin immediately asked his people to never let that happen to him.

Lesson learned: It’s good to remember who you are, and not try to move toward something so fast that you miss what’s happening now.

8. Sick, tired, wishing he could hang with his friends…it doesn’t matter. He gives 100% when he works. And when he can’t (at one point, he was so sick, they suggested he postpone a show on his tour), he’s smart enough to listen to the people on his team that are there to give him that kind of counsel.

Lesson learned: Pay attention to people smarter than you who have your best interest at heart. Know you don’t know it all.

9. He wasn’t funded. Well, not at first. And he took every opportunity to share himself with others—for instance, with jocks at radio stations who would never consider playing his music. He ended up impressing enough people that he got the backing he needed to become who he is today.

Lesson learned: Even if you know you’re not going to get this one, go in determined to turn a person into a fan

10. He works hard. Really hard. I can’t imagine what it’s like to be screamed at all the time, cried over, living in a bus, going to school, rehearsing, writing songs, learning songs, learning choreography, working with other artists (his new album has a bunch of duets), dealing with other egos, and being away from home, friends, your bed, and everything that's familiar. Can you?

Lesson learned: Not everyone has a dream as huge as his. So the level of “hard” work necessary may be different to make your own dream come true. Even so, let nothing get in the way of the dream. Choose it every single day and work for it.

Bit O’Moxie: Justin’s more than a pretty face, and chances are, you are, too. In your own way, in your own corner of the Universe, you have the opportunity to rock the dream in your way—just as Justin has. He may or may not be your idea of a great role model, but know this…he’s making things happen. And we all have a lot to learn from him. Learned and applied what I’ve shared here, how much more of your dream do you think you’d realize?

Go see the movie, do. And let me know what lessons you learned!

Stand for something so you don’t fall for anything.

How many standards do you have for your business?

When I ask new coaching clients to tell me their standards—all of ‘em—I routinely hear about fees, invoicing, and hours.

It’s one of the things that lets me know when a business doesn’t have an especially strong foundation. You can’t have one if you really only have (or consciously are aware of) three.

I know of at least 35. Yep—35. And there are probably more, but even my head gets a little woozy after that many. There are standards around vendors, and ethics, and time management, and client care, and working at home with noisy beasts (human and animal), and marketing, and healthy lifestyle, and ending relationships, and onboarding new clients, and, well… at least 35.

What’s important is to know what all your standards are, and to not just kinda know, but to have them written down after thinking about them strategically, and really embracing them as part of what forms the foundation for everything else you do.

Kinda knowing them isn’t helpful, because the first time someone pushes back about something, even slightly, you won’t have a firm enough footing to stay upright and you’ll fall over.

That’s not helpful because that’s how you wake up one morning wondering how it is that you got into whatever mess (resentment, mistake—pick the right word, it’s all the same) you find yourself in.

Every single thing about your business needs a standard written about it. Every thing. Seriously. It’s your business compass. It’s how you never have to guess about what you want to do when asked for something different or that makes you queasy in the pit of your tummy. It’s how you “stand” for each element of your business. And if it’s written down, it’s easy to access, and even easy to quote during conversations with clients, pushy family and friends, even yourself.

Hamilton said, “Those who stand for nothing fall for anything.”

Stand for your business. Stand for yourself. Stand for the dream you had when you first started working for yourself about how things would work, and about the freedom you would have. Do it by creating (mentally and in writing) great standards.

Join me? How about if we co-create a strong list of standards? I’ve shared some of mine…what can you kick in for the list? Can’t wait to see them!